ovarian cancer

i was reading that facebook post

and i have all the symptoms

i guess that could be just like a coincidence right?

i still am setting up an appointment at my obgyn

when i was young i used to wish i had cancer for some reason

i don't know why

that's really stupid

i guess i just wanted all the attention that was stigmatized around the death of a cancer patient and i also wanted to make a wish

i really didn't know how painful it would be if really had cancer

well not i am praying that i don't have cancer

i want to live a long and happy life

the stupid thing

is that people will justify my behavior

if i have cancer

and there is no excuse for my behavior

mentally ill or not (well okay  some of it yeah)

caner - no

so

i'm just, I WAS a stupid kid who didn't know anything

but now i'm not and i'm reaping the "rewards"

possibly

well
i at least have to get another pap smear

which is extremely painful.